Big News About Doraelan

SO, big news. Doraelan came at me the other day. Yesterday in fact. With an army at his back. And army of knights and soldiers in white and red. Fiercest normal people I’ve ever fought since that one mercenary who fought four harpies for a handful of gold coins. They attacked me. How did no one see an army of ten thousand people in white marching at us? My scouts and sentries are worthless. They all need to be replaced. Twice. Just to be sure.

In the midst of the battle Doraelan challenges me personally. As if I wasn’t going to find and destroy him. Bastard takes the time in the middle of a battle to speech at me. And dodges my crossbow while he’s at it. He’s swearing eternal vengeance and listing out my accomplishments like he’s angry and not impressed. He goes on and on. Vengeance this, justice that, smite me this other thing. Turns out, my rival villain isn’t a villain.

If any of you…ANY OF YOU…knew that Doraelan was a hero, I will destroy you and your world. And I’ll find a way to do it again. And I’ll make sure it hurts.

A HERO! And I haven’t taken him out yet? Disgraceful. Arneian bastard. And at least a third of his white clad army is Arneian. I thought I’d destroyed enough of them to never have to see any more of them again. Arneians. Always the crusading types. Cannot stand them. Could never stand them. That’s why I invaded, butchered my way through the streets, burned their cities and desecrated their temples. And HERE THEY ARE! Crusading at me.

Do you know how many of his white and red army actually walked away? Most of it. Almost all of it! He lost less than three hundred! And I lost two thousand. Mostly goblins, and they never mattered anyway, but still. It’s the principle of the matter. I am the Profane Lord! Scourge of the world! War Chief of the goblins! Tamer of the ogres! I killed and ate dragons! And these exiles…these REFUGEES think they can defeat me? ME! And they have the AUDACITY to actually win against me in the field? They attacked MY CAMP! MY CAMP! I will destroy them. ALL OF THEM! And any of you who knew Doraelan was a hero all along.